To Have and to Hold
$3.99
Heat Level
ON FIRE: explicit sexual activity in many or most chapters, graphic physical details, body fluids, all adult words for body parts. Physical intimacy is a big part of the plot.
Trigger Warning(s)
Brother/sister incest, non-con, rape, gang rape, sexual assault, extremely violent rape, sexual violence, sexual torture, forced breeding, forced cervical dilation, cervical penetration, face fucking, non-con fisting, whipping, humiliation, degradation, birth control tampering, public humiliation, forced piercing, needle torture, razorblade torture, suicide ideation, suicide attempt, extreme violence, prolonged torture, starvation, toenail torture, genital torture, genital removal, watersports, drowning, heavy bondage, suffocation, choking, death.
You’re supposed to dream about your wedding day. But mine was hell.
For one forbidden moment, Theo was my escape. He saw me, not as a pawn in our family games, not as his sister, scared and alone, unheard. He gave me what I needed, a final wish so I could endure.
Then that moment ended, and my life with my husband began. My captor. My monster. To him, I’m nothing more than a vessel for his legacy, a body to fill or to break, a soul to crush under his expensive shoe when my body doesn’t behave. He doesn’t love me. He doesn’t need to. Pain is all he gives me, and it consumes me. Tries to break me.
But I remember Theo’s touch. That promise in his eyes when I had that fleeting glimpse of how life could be. Before the darkness swallowed me whole. Before I made the vows I didn’t want to keep.
To have and to hold. Til death.
He is out there, somewhere, as trapped by the memory of me as I am haunted by him. My savior. My brother.
In this world, at Rafe’s feet. My desires mean nothing. But I pray for Theo, for my brother, to find me, save me. I pray to fall back into the arms of the only man on the planet worse for me than my husband.
To Have and to Hold is a 75k word pitch black romance, with forced marriage, no consent and brother/sister incest.
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CM Junk (verified owner) –
Much like Darkest Descent, the internal lives of the characters are rich, steadfast and headstrong despite their suffering. The insistence on pulling every ounce of pleasure out of happy moments, even if they’re fleeting, is such a relatable craving. The resultant yearning in the midst of extreme pain made me speed through this novel. While this is not a complete story yet, this is still a very satisfying read. I am desperate for the sequel; I want the mafia to be burned to the ground, and I want the siblings to finally find peace. Brilliant.